NETWORKING...INGRATIATE YOURSELF
Recently I had a networking attempt backfire on me miserably. How could this happen? I reach out to new people every single day, either by phone or in person and this rarely happens. But this incident left a lasting impression and it was my fault, although I didn’t think so at the time.
Having recently accepted a new position in a field I never heard of a month ago, with a high risk compensation structure (all commission), I’ve been anxious to validate the choice I’ve made. In my haste to be comfortable, I called an acquaintance that I’ve not spoken to in nearly 20 years. A mutual friend told me that she was in this same industry I’ve just joined and I was hoping if I visited with someone else in this field, I would ultimately feel more secure about my decision.
So I called this person out of the blue and told her that I’ve accepted a position doing lead generation and would like to meet with her to pick her brain since she and I are now in the same industry. What she heard was “Hi, I’m your new competitor, let’s meet so you can tell me your business secrets.”
I was quite horrified to be so misjudged and rushed to assure her I would never expect any such thing as revelation of her business secrets. Rather, I was brand new to the field and simply wanted to validate my choice by learning that the market was healthy for this industry and the like. Even though I’d just offended her, I felt offended because my motives were so misunderstood.
Just imagine if I’d approached her differently. If I’d said I’ve just become a lead generator and had heard that she had already achieved quite a successful practice in the field, building her business from the ground up and I would appreciate a few minutes to hear her insight on the potential for the industry, while discussing nothing specific to her unique business practices. Different outcome most likely.
Remember as you network, always seek to provide value first. That value might be to make someone else feel important, successful, validated, an expert in their field or something similar. It will help your agenda and will save you from unpleasant BFO’s…Blinding Flash of the Obvious.
Melanie Morris, Associate Partner, MaguireZay mmmdallas@yahoo.com
Having recently accepted a new position in a field I never heard of a month ago, with a high risk compensation structure (all commission), I’ve been anxious to validate the choice I’ve made. In my haste to be comfortable, I called an acquaintance that I’ve not spoken to in nearly 20 years. A mutual friend told me that she was in this same industry I’ve just joined and I was hoping if I visited with someone else in this field, I would ultimately feel more secure about my decision.
So I called this person out of the blue and told her that I’ve accepted a position doing lead generation and would like to meet with her to pick her brain since she and I are now in the same industry. What she heard was “Hi, I’m your new competitor, let’s meet so you can tell me your business secrets.”
I was quite horrified to be so misjudged and rushed to assure her I would never expect any such thing as revelation of her business secrets. Rather, I was brand new to the field and simply wanted to validate my choice by learning that the market was healthy for this industry and the like. Even though I’d just offended her, I felt offended because my motives were so misunderstood.
Just imagine if I’d approached her differently. If I’d said I’ve just become a lead generator and had heard that she had already achieved quite a successful practice in the field, building her business from the ground up and I would appreciate a few minutes to hear her insight on the potential for the industry, while discussing nothing specific to her unique business practices. Different outcome most likely.
Remember as you network, always seek to provide value first. That value might be to make someone else feel important, successful, validated, an expert in their field or something similar. It will help your agenda and will save you from unpleasant BFO’s…Blinding Flash of the Obvious.
Melanie Morris, Associate Partner, MaguireZay mmmdallas@yahoo.com
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